Wednesday, January 2, 2013

Deployment Day One

My husband left for deployment last night and I will not see him again for at least nine months. This is our first deployment and I think I handled it pretty well. He has been moody and but I figured that is normal. Drove him and his buddies out for a few last minute errands and dinner and had a great time. Tim saying goodbye to our dog, Rosie, made me tear up because she looked so upset. We get to the place for drop off and everything was running late. It was freezing and I forgot to wear enough layers because I thought I would be insane. He and I aren't publicly affectionate normally but we broke our rule a bit. The company put together a dance video that was hilarious. First time I've seen my husband dance. I joked with the guys and kept a brave face until the goodbye ceremony. Then I saw all the wives tearing up. So then it started to hit me that he was leaving. Out of the country. For NINE months. I took pictures and loved on him as much as I could in the time I had. I love him and appreciate him going but I am selfish and want him home with me. I teared up as they left the building but I got my "I love you" nod from him and that made me feel awesome and super sad. I watched the buses leave and broke down in my car. When I drove home I just let myself cry. Got home and took a long hot shower and cried. I was exhausted at five in the morning and passed out with the pets. Now it is morning and have to get started on life alone. That's what I have to say today because emotions are still running high.